Does the title suggest that kids get on your nerves? The answer is a big yes because they do. Kids are undoubtedly God’s gift and they give happiness and meaning to life like no other. Little Miss A is no exception and motherhood is the best present I ever got. That does not mean all days are perfect and so is our life.
Bringing up a child can be frustrating and stressful. In the present times of the lockdown, when you are the only person they see and it is your job to keep them entertained all day, it is very normal for parents to get irritated and tired by the end of the day. Kids have the ability to test your patience. As a result, there are times when you will lose your cool and trust me, nothing else you would have ever done that will make you feel so guilty later.
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You are Not a Bad Mother
I remember a few months back, Little Miss A had a meltdown every day before going to school. This was something I was not used to because she was always more than happy in the mornings. There was this morning, where after trying to calm her down for nearly two hours, I just lost it and shouted at her and sat and just cried. She was shocked and so was my husband because it was a new side of me that they were seeing. She was ok in no time and went to school and until this day, there have not been any tantrums.
This was not my strategy and I am not telling you this incident to try this trick. The point I am trying to make here is it happens to all of us. They do push us to a limit and at the end of the day, before being a mom, we are humans and thus, we react. It is ok if you lose your cool, but if there are days when it is happening often, there are some simple tips so you can keep calm when they are getting on your nerves.
What to do When they Get On Your Nerves?
Disappear
This is the best and the easiest strategy I feel. When the kids are troubling too much and you are getting irritated beyond a limit, just take a time out. Go to the bathroom or a room and lock yourself in for a bit. If you have someone to be with them, go for a quick walk or run. Basically, move away and calm down so you come back with renewed patience. Sometimes, kids take this time to settle as well so when you come back, it is a happy situation.
Find the Triggers
This is my observation in the quarantine. The schedule has changed and I end up working late at night. As a result, I am not fresh in the morning. This is the time of the day when my patience levels with Little Miss A are at the lowest level. I am a different person in the latter part of the day after I take a power nap.
The point here, you as a parent, need to see if there is something you need and do not have which makes you irritated. For some I have noticed, it is the work pressure and for some irritability with someone else in the house. Kids become the easier target the moment they do something wrong. Thus, see your needs first and attend to yourself. Kids will be ok as well.
Remember the Good Times
Your kids are undoubtedly adorable and I am sure each day they give you a million reasons to smile. Remember the good times and these moments and your anger will melt away.
I sometimes, just sit quietly and look at her pics on my phone. Some of them are too cute, and they just make me smile and I relax. And I am back to the battlefield with new strength and tactics. Sometimes just hugging these little munchkins calms you and them down as this is therapeutic.
Hugging has many benefits and one is to calm kids down. If you did not know thus, head to my post, Hug Your Kids When They Are Being Horrible.
Stay Away from Social Media
Now that I have advised you to look at your phone, just look at pictures. If you click on Facebook or Instagram you are gone. Why? Because here you will see the perfect pictures and videos of perfect moms and kids and you will feel more horrible. Moms and kids on social media are always better than you and your child, so stay away.
Have Some Me Time Daily
When you are spending all your time with the child, you are bound to get exhausted. Even if you are a working mom, you will be exhausted after doing that work all day. There should be some time of the day which is just yours. It should be your call, what you do.
One thing, I would recommend is exercise or go for a walk or jog with your headphones. This has health benefits and also you will be able to relax and feel better. Me time is important for everyone so why not you mummy? Moms should read the post, 10 Self Care Tips for Moms, to know how to pamper themselves and give priority to themselves.
They are Humans Too
The above are the 5 things I do to stay calm with Little Miss A. I know kids get on your nerves and you need an unlimited amount of patience but remember they are humans too. Little and not emotionally strong, they have their moments too.
Anxiety is a common issue with kids and there can be things that bother them. As parents, we need to help them and understand. If you feel they are pressing the wrong buttons and you will lose your cool, use some of my tips and I am sure you will de-stress and be back to handle them with full energy.
For tips to handle anxiety, read, 6 Helpful Tips to Handle Anxiety In Toddlers.
I usually disappear. I take a 5- 10-minute break and when I am calm then go back and handle the situation calmly. I also like to check for triggers like hunger and sleep. Great post again.
Thank you so much. Glad you like the post 🙂
Kids of every age group test us. And it is natural for us to loose our calm at times. But thats okay. From my parenting experience, one thing that I have learned so far is we should not do such acts that will make us feel bad later. It is always better to take one step back when we see situation and out temper is going out of our hands. It has always worked for me. Right now, I have a pre-ten and a pre-schooler at home..both have their own set of demands..
Thank you so much. Glad you like the post 🙂
My sister is hesitant about entering motherhood because of this reason among a few others. Sometimes the whole experience seems like a huge ordeal. I guess it would really help to have others look after the kids sometimes so you can take your time off. Nice tips here, thanks for sharing. 🙂
Thank you so much. Glad you like the post Tell your sister it is not bad and in fact, when she is ready she will enjoy being a mother.
In the high pressure situation that all of us are forced into, I have learned to appreciate your posts more. I disappear when I’m angry because that’s the only way to stop myself from snapping at him.
Thank you so much for your kind words. Glad you like the post 🙂
This is completely relatable. Yes, we lose patience some times. But again, the realization follows. You have pointed out some very good tips to keep ourselves from being reactive in the situation.
Thank you so much. Glad you like the post 🙂
This is so soothing and enlightening. Every mom faces this and more so during these times. I am so following these tips Arushi! Thank you so much!
Thank you so much. Glad you like the post 🙂
I know that everyone is not fortunate enough to have a supportive partner, but I ask my husband to step in when I’m having trouble with my son. The roles have to be equally divided, and different approaches help!
I agree and that is my approach when my husband is around. These tips are when he is not around. Actually when he is with my daughter, she does not need me so there is no chance of a problem. 😉
I agree and that is my approach when my husband is around. These tips are when he is not around. Actually when he is with my daughter, she does not need me so there is no chance of a problem. 😉
What a concrete post buddy. Undoubtedly children get on our nerves sometimes and we must have tools in our kitty to combat the situation, I am borrowing your tool number 1, disappear 😊
Haha all yours darling. 🙂 All the best. Thanks for reading 🙂
Very useful pointers shared by you Arushi, Many moments come to test us as a mom how we respond in a particular situation that matters patience is the key of all, also as you mentioned the point Find The trigger actually in these exhaustive days only this one is working for me. Well written pointers.
Thank you so much. Glad you like the post 🙂
As a new mother, I always wanted to set things right whenever my kid went cranky or naughty. Now I know better, I often disappear not reappearing again until lthe tantrum has passed and I can talk sense with the boys.
Thank you so much. Glad you agree 🙂
Bang on, totally relatable, as one seriously needs to keep calm when kids get on your nerves. As all days are not the same so are such days too and we need to handle them patiently and calmly. Great pointers to handle it.
Thank you so much. Glad you like the post 🙂
Loved the point of avoiding social media and the perfect pictures.. These pictures are leading many people to depression actually.
Arushi can you do something about the font colour in this comment box. It is far too hazy and I am not able to even read it.Thanks
Thank you for pointing it out. I never realized. Will fix it. And thanks for reading 🙂
Again an amazing post arushi and I agree that each day is different and sometimes we loss our patience when kids get on our nerves. I always prefer to take a time out..I go for a walk or just move away for sometime, when I feel that things are not in my control. and y es..self care and taking out a me time is extremely important , this is the thing that makes you refresh and give an energy to complete other mothering and household responsibilities.
Thank you so much. Its nice when other moms agree with you. Gives a feeling you are doing a good job. 🙂
Darling you have shared fabulous point. I gonna time ,these point now.
Aww thank you. Hope they help 🙂
Amazing tips Arushi. I must say you have an amazing grip over the parenting and motherhood topic. You always come up with sensible and reasonable solutions and tips.
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Thank you so much for the kind words. Made my day and motivates me to write 🙂
This probably is a story in every house. I feel guilty too at times for reacting the way I do . But you are right you too to take a break and disappear is a lot better way to break that loop.
It usually works for all. Thanks for reading 🙂
Such a relatable, genuine and need of the hour post. I disappear or ignore that helps to calm my nerves. Good pointers mentioned, Arushi. And yes, staying away from SM is so important.
Thanks Debi. Glad you like the post
Kids are usually okay on their own, it us who keep a check on them if they are getting entertained or not…The points you have mentioned are very relatable and must be practiced to keep ourself sane and a happy environment at home
Thanks. Glad you like the post 🙂
I used to react a lot initially. But nowadays I prefer to stay calm , put myself in her shoes ,think and then act. Lovely post
Wow. That is awesome. You need a lot of patience to do that. Thanks for reading 🙂
Great tips, I need them quite often as I have a combo of toddler and tween at home and they both make sure to make things difficult for me.
Wow. Hats off to you. I hope my tips help you 🙂
I have had some bouts of crying because of my boy getting on my nerves and then me shouting on him and feeling guilty. This is a much needed post for Mommies. Well written Arushi👏👏
Thank you so much Poorvi. 🙂
I disappear in the bathroom. It’s overwhelming fr both mom and kid. Some me time is essential.
Yes it for sure is. Disappearing works for most. Thank you for reading 🙂
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