My best friend during my pregnancy was Google. I read information on everything I could. I also read all the pregnancy books that were recommended, and with the pre-natal classes I thought I was well prepared to take on every challenge of motherhood.
I am not saying that all the information that I gathered was unused, but nothing was as simple as it seemed when I was reading and there was nothing which gave me the exact information.
There were many things which kind of came up as a surprise and my research failed me many times. Motherhood undoubtedly, is one of the most beautiful things that happened to me, but, there is absolutely nothing in this world which can prepare you for this adventurous ride.
Now that Little Miss A is way beyond that stage, when I look back and see how these years have gone, I can think of a few things which are a reality of mummy hood but no one will ever tell you about.
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What Should You Know About the First Year of Motherhood?
First year of motherhood can be different for each mom as each baby is different. You will get plenty of advice, some good and some bad, but no one will ever tell you on what you should know about yourself in this phase.
Let us talk about some basic things which you might not find in any book but you need to know to feel better. Postpartum depression is a fact and must not be ignored and thus, for a new mom to feel good about herself is important.
If you are a new mom facing the new mom blues, you should read, A Simple Guide for New Moms to Understand Postpartum Depression.
You Will Look Pregnant for a Few Months
Do not get fooled by the way celebrities look. Each individual is different and so is the body.
Though I lost most of my pregnancy weight on the Operation table, but still I looked bloated and a few months pregnant for a few months. You have these aches and pains; after all you made this tiny angel.
You have to manage to get some rest, eat well, stay hydrated and move around as much as you can. If you want to know how beautiful you are, just look at the masterpiece you have created; you will get all the self confidence in the world in a moment.
Postnatal massages are a great stress reliever. To know more, read the post on Postnatal Massage.
You Will Make Mistakes
Your child can throw a surprise at you any day and any minute. You are on this journey which you are not prepared for and thus, it is normal and natural for you to make mistakes. Do not strive to be the perfect mother, because for your child you are perfect and the only person he needs. Make mistakes and learn from them, and never ever lose your cool.
Understand Your Baby
No book will tell you how your baby will behave in any situation. Each baby is different and you will feel yours is unique. Do not waste time to know how other babies are. Spend time with your little one and notice things about them.
You will be the only one who will know what comforts them and what makes them smile and what upsets them. There is no standardised model for a baby. They all go through their schedules and growth spurts. Knowing about them is good but understanding your little one is crucial.
You have to create your own small world where you both set the rules. Do not try to follow a rule book and time line chart as that will never happen.
Read the post, Growth Spurts in the First Year
Ignore Unsolicited Advice
Everyone in our country has an opinion, and every other person who you meet will tell you the best way to bring up your baby. People mean well but all these suggestions might have worked for them but there is no guarantee will work for you as well.
Remember, only you know what is best for your child and if you want peace in your life; just ignore them. Become selective and register what you think will be helpful and ignore the rest. Whatever you do, you will be the most awesome mother for your child.
All new parents must read the post, Why Advice for New Parents Needs to be Filtered?
Learn to Accept
You will need to be patient and learn to get flexible. The baby will set her own rules and there is nothing you can do about them. If you cannot cope up ask for help. Again, do not try to be a super woman because you are not. Just go with the flow and enjoy this beautiful time with your baby. These precious moments will never come back so have fun.
Enjoy the First Year of Motherhood
Raising a child is the most difficult yet the most beautiful thing you will do. Each day is a new one and there is so much to learn from this journey. The biggest problem is that we as mothers do not support each other and this leads to majority of the problems.
We need to make mistakes so others learn from them and not criticize you. Do not treat motherhood as a competition; you are the player and the judge. The first year might look like a task but time just flies away and all you are left behind with is, pictures and memories.
Milestones are a reference point, and do not lose sleep over them. If you are stressing about your child not reaching milestones, read the post, Why Worry About Baby Milestones in the First Year.
All new parents, must watch this award winning documentary, Year One, to understand the first year better.
