“Lessons from the lockdown”. This is a post I have been intending to write since April but something or the other happened and I never got down to writing it. I guess there is a time for everything and it had to wait till today.
Why did it have to wait for today? Because today I learned the most important lesson and maybe the toughest one too. Life is unpredictable and we still focus on the future. There was a death in the family, and at a time, I wanted to be with my parents, I could not go and I am not sure when will I be able to. Human contact is needed and we live in a world that survives through virtual mediums. What an irony!!
COVID-19 has made us see something we never envisaged. Lockdown, isolation, quarantine, social distancing were just words in the dictionary till the beginning of 2020 but today they are a part of our life. The coronavirus has given the world a pandemic and I do not think there is even one person who has not been affected by it.
Some have lost their loved ones to it, some have been affected physically, many financially, and even more mentally. Be it a child or a senior citizen, it has changed life for everyone.
Table of Contents
COVID-19 Lockdown
When the first lockdown was announced, we were extremely careful and thought it will last a few days. My only disappointment then was that we had to cancel my birthday trip to Ranthambore. (That now seems to be the most trivial thing ever).
The lockdown kept increasing but we stayed at home and somewhere we started enjoying the family time we got which we had never imagined and the pollution-free blue skies which seemed a dream in Gurgaon.
Nearly 4 months later, we are still home trying to keep the family as safe as we can. If I have to summarize these four months I will say, lost 3 people in the family, this is the longest I have not seen my parents (and this is the worst thing ever for me), this is the maximum time I have spent with my husband (this was the only blessing of the lockdown and Little Miss A will agree as well) and with lots of lessons from the lockdown, I wish 2020 now brings relief and a smile.
Lessons From the Lockdown
What has happened, why it happened, what could we have done are just questions and there is no reason we need to waste time on them. What is important is what we will take forward from here and what are the lessons we learnt in the lockdown of COVID-19. Let me tell you my lessons from the lockdown:
Live for the Present
We waste our time planning our future and thinking about what will happen. We get upset with what happened in the past but how many times do we live in the present.
We think we will call that one next week, go meet the friend next month after this assignment, plan the next summer vacation in winters and spend the weekend on the iPad doing the bookings rather than enjoying the sunny afternoon, set targets for work and not what we will do with the kids in the evening and so on.
When do we live for the present? Life is unpredictable and it takes its course and not what you planned. Rather than fretting about the future, why not enjoy the present.
Yes, planning the future for your child, is important but what is more important is to give them time today. These memories are the best legacy you will leave for them and this is a very important lesson from the lockdown.
Life is Simple
One of the other most important lessons from the lockdown I learnt or maybe I can say a realization is that life is simple, it is we who over complicate it. I am sure most of those who are reading the post will agree, we have learnt to enjoy the simpler things in life again. We appreciate those small things which people of our generation enjoyed as kids and maybe our kids never imagined.
The carom and the ludo came back to the house and the play areas were not missed, home cooked meals took over those fancy Thai and Japanese meals, just a walk outside was a luxury and not a visit to the mall, a workout at home with your spouse was far better than sweating it out in the gym alone and most importantly, playing with your child and keeping them busy was not so tough as we thought, instead it was fun.
The ability to spend quality time with the family doing simple things has been the best gift of corona times and a lesson we all need to take forward. Simple pleasures of life give us more happiness than we can ever imagine. We forget to stop and look around to find solace in the small things around us as we are focusing on something distant and unachievable.
Read our post, Top 5 Benefits of Spending Quality Time with Kids.
We Have Much More Than We Need
The lockdown started in March and with it stopped all shopping and deliveries. Buying basic groceries was also a luxury and we all learnt to live with what we had. I am sure if it was a normal summer, I would have bought so many clothes for my daughter. Now with no option, we managed in the hand me downs we had and in some of the clothes of last year.
We do not always need the things we buy; they are mostly the things we want. One big change I have seen in myself in the last few weeks is that now when I like something or if there is something I might need, I just add it to the shopping cart on the website and leave it. I come back to it a few days later and trust me, I do not need half of the things now. The impulsive buying has stopped for sure.
Learnt to live in what we have and gratitude for it is one of the most important lessons from the lockdown.
Social Media is for Recreation
Social media is important for work for many, it is a platform for many to express themselves and for many it is there source of income, but in my opinion, at the end of the day it is best for recreation and keeping yourself updated.
People use these platforms as tickets to interfere and comment on any one’s life. Judgments, hatred, unwanted suggestions and of course, no realization of hurting the other person. People showed off their skills and rather than encouraging others, it became a competition on who did better.
With less work pressure, there were judgments and negativity all over. The celebrity deaths and the negative comments just showed the negativity that is around us. If we do not like someone’s views, why can one not, continue scrolling. Why do they need to be judge and write negative comments?
I have taken a decision that I will just use these platforms to know what is happening with the people around me and use it to motivate myself. You will have enough content, which is positive, just that have the mindset to look for it.
As parents, it is our duty to use social media wisely and to stop judging people as we will set the wrong examples. You must read the post, Parents: To Stop Judging People is the Need of the Hour.
Do Not Compare and Fret
Stemming from my last point, another lesson I learnt is not to compare yourself and fret. Social media usage grew leaps and bounds and so did the posts on the amazing things people did at home. As a mother, I have seen posts of moms having a structured day planned with amazing activities for the kids, going organic and giving just healthy food to kids and working on all skills for the child.
Here my four-year-old refused to do any activity which I planned (if I did), was watching more screen than usual days, eating more sweets and not focusing on her online classes at all and of course, the number of meltdowns and tantrums have increased.
There are very few mothers who will post this though trust me there are many who face it. What happens we just see the perfect lives of others which they put on social media, we feel guilty and more than often the frustration comes out on the kids.
Of all the lessons from the lockdown, my most important learning is to not judge them from the life they portray, be happy in yours, and never compare. You are the best mom to your child, that’s it.
You Alone Can Handle Your Emotions
In my opinion, emotional intelligence is the most important and the last few months have just strengthened this. No one understands your emotions and you have to be capable to handle them without any external support.
A drink, a friend, a smoke, a drive or shopping should not be the way to de-stress yourself. Even your spouse or your best friend will not know exactly how you feel and many times you might not want to talk. If you are feeling low, you should know how to get the zest back.
Emotions are yours and the best person to address them and understand them is you. The day you start depending on others, it gets tough. This is not only one of the most essential lessons from the lockdown but something we all must remember always.
Adapting to the changes is important and you must read the post by Alpana, Pandemic Lessons.
Human Contact is Essential
FaceTime, Zoom and WhatsApp have undoubtedly kept us connected but the magic of human contact is surely missing. I am missing my best friends, sitting and talking endlessly and discussing random things. A hug from my parents, their warmth as we sit and talk is being missed terribly.
In many situations a hug speaks a thousand words and that is one thing we are not able to do. This is when we understand the importance of a simple hug. To be there for the people who matter to you is important, and that basic right has been taken away by the COVID-19.
Learning Should Never Stop
Last but not the least, the best learning of COVID-19 is the realization that learning should never stop. I have not only learnt some important lessons from the lockdown but also I have spent a lot of time reading and learning things. I have bought blogging courses which I was always vary of and heard and read experts, attended live sessions.
The new lessons have not only taught me a lot but the confidence it has brought along is amazing. This reminder that learning makes you richer and undoubtedly, happier is the best thing ever and I have to thank the COVID-19 for it.
The lockdown gave me time to focus on my blog. I have to thank Shailaja V for amazing tips and guidance on blogging and how to improve my website. I will always be grateful to her for all the blogging lessons.
The best part was that the website was selected as one of the Top 100 Writing Blogs on the web and it also ranked in the Top 100 Parenting Blogs by Feedspot.
Hope It’s a Happy Journey Now
2020 has not been a very happy year though some parts of it did bring a smile and made us happy. I hope the rest of the year brings smiles and happiness and it is the end of the sad news. Hope we all get to meet our loved ones soon, give a hug and return our kids a happier and healthier world. Gratitude for the things we have and appreciation for the people around us is what will guide us through the rest of the phase. Hopefully,
“Nothing but good times ahead”
First so sorry for your loss arushi and I could understand how hard it must be for you to having that tragedies in your family. Moving to post… just loved it for so many reasons. Perfect detailing of each point always impressed me a lot and I always feel connected with your thoughts as well as your write up. I agree social media had become a place of unnecessary competition and many people feel inferior after seeing other people s picture perfect life with photos and videos. Like you, I had also stopped using SM for not necessary things.
All And all a great post.
Thank you Surbhi for your kind words. I am so glad your thoughts resonate with mine. Thanks for stopping by and as always making me smile with your thoughtful comments 🙂
Loved your thoughts Arushi! You have aptly and beautifully summed up the key to remaining happy and what this lockdown has taught us despite the adversities caused by the situation.
Life is simple and we should live each day being grateful for all that we have!
Thank you so much for your appreciation, Jyoti. Means a lot to me. Thank you for stopping by 🙂
beautifully said yestrue lessons to be understood by parents in this era very nice article i loved it
Thank you so much. I am so glad you like the post 🙂
Sorry for your loss Arushi. Stay strong dear. This lockdown has introduced us to a few unknown side of our personalities. It is so surprising that we make things, situations so complicated that sometimes we feel getting lost. Life is not that complicated but our choices, decision make it that way. Talking about social media so yes I agree, these days, it is becoming like a marathon. Personally, I have always stayed away from any such kind of a competition. I enjoy what I do and I not get into any such rat race.
That indeed is the best attitude to have. Thank you for stopping by
Social media shows 5 mins or at times lesser of the perfect lives. I could resonate with your post, Arushi. Video calls can’t fill the gap of missing warmth of parents and siblings. We missed the last rituals of multiple family members in past few months. Hence, can understand your feeling. Sorry for your loss.
Thank you so much, Pragnya. I am glad you liked the post and could resonate with it. Thanks for stopping by 🙂
[…] lessons the last few months have taught me. If you want to read more about them, head to the post, A Mom’s Simple and Important Lessons from the Lockdown. The aim should be to remember these and work towards a better, positive, hopeful and happy future […]
[…] lessons the last few months have taught me. If you want to read more about them, head to the post, A Mom’s Simple and Important Lessons from the Lockdown. The aim should be to remember these and work towards a better, positive, hopeful and happy future […]
Loved the take aways, you alone can handle your emotions and Live for the Present. From you post, these two points touched a chord. Again a well written and presented post from you Arushi. Loved every bit of it.
Yup. Living for the present and being happy with what you have is the key to being happy. And yes life is pretty simple but we Complicate it…
ya, I remember seeing other post make me worry. we are not doing great and that time I stop using social media. More I see then more I will think. Its not a competition, live life on your own ways.
Yes, I agree. 🙂
Firstly so sorry for your loss Arushi, the thought of losing a known person scares me ,I don’t how you are coping up..but this pandemic has taught every one that how uncertain life is. Apart from that I really liked your point about ,”we have much more than what we need” that’s the most important thing I learned during these times and I and o thankful for that
Thank you so much 🙂
You have got the gist of the lockdown period and it’s positive impact on us. The influence social medial has on is these days is immense but we have to be smart and choose family first to win control over the madness social media can create for us.
I agree. Thanks for stopping by
Universal lessons that apply to us all. I like the way you ended the post on a positive note- it has indeed been a time of learning and growth!
Thanks Noor
Very well written arushi.congratulationsmon your website being chosen. Indeed these are valuable lessons that the pandemic has taught and would be etched in our minds forever.
Learning is the key aspect of the pandemic, if we learn to adapt we will be happy.
Completely agree 🙂